Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy: Film #84 of Film 365

Thursday 20th October 2011

Director: Tomas Alfredson
Year: 2011
Stars: Gary Oldman, John Hurt, Colin Firth, Tom Hardy, Toby Jones, Mark Strong, Benedict Cumberbatch

My initial reaction to Tinker Tailor Solder Spy was "what?!". And I won't take it back. I just don't understand. I don't understand why critics loved it, I don't understand what was going on, I don't understand why so many of the scenes were considered important when they were clearly irrelevant, I don't understand Kathy Bate's accent (Perry from Kevin and Perry anyone? You can't take a character seriously when you're imagining them as a 13 year-old schoolboy with their cap on backwards), I don't understand why I'll never get back those 2 1/2 hours of my life...

The movie had something to do with moles. And a Russian agent who it seemed that you were meant to care who he was, but apparently you weren't. And lots to do with fanatically praising sometimes-good actors about how amazing they are in this movie (that end scene with Gary Oldman? Really? Please).

Maybe I needed to have been alive in the '70s and have seen the original drama. Maybe I need be more intelligent. Maybe I need to like grainy shots more. Maybe I need to have a reverence for Gary Oldman that just isn't there (yes, he can be good. But I want to be watching Harry Potter, not this). But I have none of these things, and I don't want them. Especially not after having to sit through this.

Rating: 1.5 out of 5